Football Jokes

[Rodney]

Wayne Bridge sent his missus a replica of his willy made from Cadburys Chocolate, she said she prefers Terry's.

[jamie]

Man City are considering a new sponsorship deal with viagra for those times when you wait years for a semi and then lose it right at the vital moment

[simon b]

JT1...
Breaking News.......john terry arrested before yesterdays game for speeding and jumping a bridge!

JT2....
Apparently Mrs Bridge was charging Terry for her services! She didn't like to be called a prostitute so she opted to call herself a Toll Bridge!!!

JT3....
As expected John Terry defied his critics and Scored Away from home.......AGAIN!!

[Rodney]

Well no official statement from John Terry yet but it's common knowledge that he's the best defender in the world. I'd just like to see how he gets himself out of this hole without getting covered in *****.

[Rodney]

Unofficial statement from JT.
"I was playing with my balls on an away pitch, when I saw a great chance to score from inside the box, I'd already deceived the defence with a bit of ducking and diving, which left me with a one on one with the goal keeper. After a bit of dribbling my first shot hit the keeper straight in the face but I wasn't going to miss with my second, which was rammed in the back of the goal with such force that both goal posts shook, I received a huge cry of delight for my efforts"

"Now what's all this about WB's ex Girlfriend"